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When I was a kid, I really enjoyed watching Terry Bradshaw play football. I loved his fearlessness, his rocket-arm, and his fun-loving personality. I even changed the way I held a football to throw more like he did! As I have watched his career post-football, I have also been impressed by his enthusiasm and genuine knowledge of the game.

I have always enjoyed Terry Bradshaw….until yesterday.
Bradshaw
Yesterday, I just happened upon FOX Football’s segment where the participants get to rant on a topic. Bradshaw decided to rant on Brett Favre’s to return to the NFL after deciding to retire. Despite the fact that I am a Viking fan, I was actually against Favre coming back. I remember watching Willie Mays, Johnny Unitas, Joe Namath and Michael Jordan come back with dubious results, and I didn’t want to see that happen to Favre. Still, as he said at the time, “it’s my legacy”….and he had every right to play again.

What bugged me about Bradshaw’s rant, however, was his criticism of Favre for breaking his word. Bradshaw spoke about how heinous it was for Favre to go back on what he said….to go back on his word.

Uh….Mr. Bradshaw? According to public record, you have thrice stood at the altar with a woman and said “’til death do us part”, or something of the sort. Which concerns you more….someone who has a change of heart regarding their employment history, or someone who breaks a vow in front of family and friends regarding their life partner?

I guess I’ll be watching CBS.

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What would I wish for? Hmmmm….. Well, an easy one would be world peace. Another might be a cure for cancer, or food for hungry children. I think I have a better idea….

How ’bout I wish for a useful set of ears?

If I could hear the story of the poor, the pain of the hungry, the desperation of those in war-torn lands, wouldn’t that change how I live? If I shut my mouth and listened to people who disagree with me, instead of writing them off as “stupid” or “evil”, wouldn’t I be more apt to arrive at wiser, more well-rounded conclusions?

The polarization of our culture grieves me. The subtle sounds of compassion, love and justice are being drowned out by voices shouting invective at those who come at life with a different point of view. I don’t agree with everybody, and some views are abhorrent to me. Nevertheless, I’d be wise to remember that even those I disagree with may have something worth considering in their arguments. Proverbs 18:13 states, “He who answers before listening – that is his folly and his shame.”

World peace, starvation and cancer are complex issues – incredibly important issues. Still, I think I’d be well-served to start with my ears, for when we all begin listening, we may hear just enough to begin coming up with solutions – together.

Thoughts?

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I love it when things go well.

I was flying from San Diego to Indianapolis today when we were informed by our pilot that one of the engines of the plane was overheating. (One of the airline employees said it was on fire!) We quickly diverted to LAX, where we were met by a host of fire trucks and other emergency vehicles. It was quite a show.

While sitting on the tarmac waiting for our instructions, I struck up a conversation with a fellow passenger named Mark. He seemed like a really nice, positive guy. As the conversation progressed, he informed me that he was not only going through a divorce (he and his ex have 3 kids), but that minutes before he got on the plane he was informed that his entire division was laid off.

Family. Job. Gone.

smileWhat I really enjoyed about our conversation, albeit short, was Mark’s positive outlook on the future. While admitting that his life was in a tough place, (he wasn’t delusional), he seemed genuinely ready to confront whatever hurdles he’d be facing with determination and a smile.

It struck me….clichés are clichés because they’re true, and the cliché that life is 90% attitude never seemed more real to me.

Thanks for the attitude adjustment, Mark.

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SoybeanFieldWe live in Fishers, Indiana. We really enjoy living here, but honestly, it’s still a town in search of its identity. We are in the heart of the suburbs, yet we remain surrounded by private farms. It’s pretty cool, though. I love driving 3 blocks from my house and seeing beautiful fields of soybeans and corn….it brings me a sense of peace, I think.

I was driving my son home from the driving range the other day, and for some reason, the uniformity of the fields struck me. Virtually every soybean plant was the same height and consistency, and the corn….well, it looked like the DNA had been cloned a millions times or so.

I pointed this out to my son, and then commented, “it’s no wonder….every stalk and plant was raised in exactly the same environment!” The water, fertilizer and soil makeup these plants grew up in were identical, and the results were consistent with that fact.

It occurred to me that plants, in this case, are not analogous to people. My 4 children grew up in the same house, with the same parents, the same church, in the same schools with, in several cases, the same teachers. Still, my kids have very little similarities….they’re completely different! So it must be “nature”, right??

I was enjoying the brilliance of my observation, when my son astutely pointed out that my “plants”, (my kids), weren’t planted at the same time.

*Sigh*

So I suppose I am back to “both/and”. What do you think?

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arguingI have never liked negative humor, or really, negative talk if any kind. Joan Rivers used to drive me nuts, because she couldn’t seem to be funny without ripping someone else down. That mean-spirited style lives on in talk radio today, and I can’t stand a minute of Rush Limbaugh or Al Franken. In my opinion, you don’t make yourself taller by standing on someone else’s shoulders.

The radio, however, only offends you if you turn it on, and when you do tune in to those programs, you know what to expect.

In this era of social media, where everyone and everything seems to be connected, it’s easy to get ambushed. It amazes me that so many still don’t understand one simple concept….when you write something, it’s likely that someone will read it. And if it’s full of invective, it’s likely to illicit a response more negatively focused on the writer than on the subject. Still, getting “flamed” on the internet hurts…and reading it is always painful, even when it doesn’t involve me.

My good friend Scott Naylor, who used to consult with companies on their IT etiquette, said he constantly had to remind his clients that when they write anything, “there’s a person reading this on the other end!”

If you look around on the internet, you’ll find hundreds of “rules of engagement” on the ‘net. Let’s boil them down to just 2….don’t write anything that you wouldn’t say to that person’s face, and remember the Golden rule. With that, I think we’ll all be good.

Thoughts?

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A few years ago, my friend Dave Fackler shared with me a conversation he’d just had with his then 17 year-old son.

Like most 17 year-olds, his son was experiencing brain-lock, and wasn’t seeing a particular situation clearly. In a moment of clarity I have yet to experience, Dave came up with an idea. “J.D.,” he said, “What would the 27 year-old version of you say to you right now?” Confused yet? What Dave was asking J.D. to do was to project himself into the future and give himself advice!

There are times in our lives where we just can’t seem to get ourselves out of the moment….we become paralyzed by decisions facing us. The future always seems murky, and looking ahead 2 years seems like an eternity. Looking behind two years, however, seems as quick as a wink. What if we could make decisions looking back? After all, isn’t “hindsight 20-20”?

Since Dave shared that story with me, I often try to imagine myself 5 years from now, lamenting what I wish I would have done….then I do it today!

Does that make sense to anyone but me??

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As I mentioned in an earlier post, I used to LOVE getting my grandparents to talk about when they were kids. They both grew up in Toledo, Ohio near the turn of the last century, and their stories mesmerized me. It was an era I was totally unfamiliar with, and the picture the history books painted for me paled in comparison to the first-hand view I received from my grandparents.

There have always been generational gaps, but it seems like that gap has widened measurably today. Students don’t understand the world their parents and grandparents grew up in, and I think most folks from the older generation have felt completely lost trying to communicate with the younger generation.

Then along came Facebook.
facebook
I have heard it said that the fastest growing group on FB is women over the age of 55….and my kids live there! I have Facebook friends that are almost 80, and some that are 12. (Sorry, FB age requirement.) I think I could make a pretty strong case that Facebook may be the most multi-generational platform ever created….online or off. My questions is…is it “inter-generational”, and by that I mean, do the generations communicate with each other?

There is so much to be learned by communicating across generational lines. Both young and old can learn by listening, engaging…..really connecting. Perhaps in this age of social networking we can see some barriers begin to come down, and in the conversation that follows, we’ll see the richness we’ve missed by being in our generational silos.

Thoughts? Observations?

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microwaveI was in my last year or two of high school when my parents bought their first microwave. It was so exciting! For a child of the 60’s and 70’s, I felt like I had just entered the Star Trek era. In goes frozen food – out comes a beautifully prepared, delicious meal.

Then we began to actually use it. First of all, the thing was the size of a Smart Car – and just about as useful! (Okay, that was a cheap shot.) Then, when we turned it on, it sounded like a 50,000 watt transformer was switched on! I’m also pretty sure the seal wasn’t perfect, which might explain the 3rd eye growing in the middle of my forehead.

The truth is, while a microwave is a useful tool, it’s not the right tool for everything. I love to eat, and when I go to an elegant restaurant, I’m glad they don’t prepare the entire meal in a microwave.

As a “Type A” kind of guy, I need to remind myself constantly that bigger and faster isn’t always better. Better is better. Most often, meaning, purpose and beauty are found in nuance and subtlety. I’m glad that Steinbeck and Dickens didn’t write in Cliff’s Notes. I’m glad my friend and artist Mako Fujimura takes the time to meticulously prepare his materials before he starts creating his amazing works. It takes time to create, and it takes time to experience someone’s creation.

When I read a great book, experience a great work of art, or eat a gourmet meal, I’m glad that not everything can be summed up in 140 characters. (Check out this hilarious video that illustrates this beautifully.)

To be sure, there are many situations where I am glad I have a microwave at my disposal. Like most of us, I’m a busy guy with a busy family, and I often need to move quickly. While I do appreciate the convenience, what I really appreciate the time it saves to free me up to savor moments that are begging to be savored.

What’s your story?